Cait. (joyouschild) wrote in thelostacademy,

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I have tests. Tests mean procrastination. Oh yes. Thusly, I present Neep Scrips. All eight of them.

Page One
Daikoku lands: Ooooof
Des throws shoe over her shoulder- hits Daikoku
Daikoku (medium small): Ow!
Lem: Now remember this is supposed to be a medium small ow.
Des: Stop sniveling.
Daikoku: But I’m not!
Des: What are you doing here? Who are you?
Daikoku: Why should I tell you?
Des: Because I can tell you where you are. Heh. You don’t know where you are. Do you. (points)(pause)

Page Two
Daikoku: (stands up, brushes himself off) Well… it was nice to meet you, you malevolent overgrown bewinged gnome.
Des (in the background): gnome?
Daikoku (tries the homing spell, parchment floats down: Abort. Retry. Failure. Prophecy Failure.)
Owen with Lem and Ob
Lem: Well there goes that idea.
Owen: My homing spells always work.
Daikoku (stunned): But homing spells always work?…?
Des (comes forward): Gnome? I am a pixie
Daikoku: Shush. Not now. I need to figure this out. (waves parchment at Des)
Des: Figure what out? (snatches parchment) Prophecy intervention? No! Not him! Dear God not him!

Page Three
And then the Neep appeared. (Neep appears clinging to the front of Daikoku’s shirt)
Daikoku: What is that?
And then the Neep said “Neep.”
Neep: Neep.
And then the Neep was gone.
Des (thinks): NO. IT. CANNOT. BE. HIM. He called me a gnome!

Page Four
Ob: The number four means death in Chinese
Des (heaves a huge sigh): That was the Neep. You were just blessed.
Daikoku: Blessed. By the Neep. Ok. Well that explains absolutely nothing.
Des: Just because you don’t understand the explanation, doesn’t mean it’s not there. No. Wait. We started off badly. I’m Des, and I am a pixie, not a gnome.
Daikoku: OooKay. My name is Daikoku nishanari et Taiban but-
Des: Ack! Too many syllables! TOO many syllables! I can’t cope!
Daikoku: … most people just call me Daikoku.
Des: Oh. Riight. So- where’re you from?
Daikoku: The Lost.
Des: You’re a lost Lost student?
Daikoku: Shut up.
Ob (pointing at Eck): I thought she was the lost Lost student?
Eck: Shut up.

Page Five
Des: Weeell, We’re not far from Wadden. I could take you there.
Daikoku: Why”
Des: Because I pity you, you poor ickle lost lost student. *snicker *
(Daikoku speechless)
Des (-_-): Because the Neep blessed you. Gotta help you. Can’t argue with the Neep.
(Daikoku still speechless)
Des: Well alright- Wadden is this way. Come on.
Daikoku (mutters): I’m supposed to follow a maniacal malevolent overgrown bewinged … gnome?

Page Six
(A leaf falls)
Ob: What’s the leaf for?
Lem: It indicates the passage of time. Could be ten minutes, could be twelve minutes. Who knows?
(D y D are walking)
Daikoku (classic scene): Wait- Do you smell something?
Des (holding nose): glurfniger(GLOWING)serklikmad NO buckinglygrrrf
Daikoku: Something smells burnt.
O&L: Her nose smells burnt?

Page Seven
(Montage of Padric parts)
Ob: Oooo! Ominous music! Ominous goat!
(They see padric)
Lem: Ominous goat?! (-_-)
(Woosh of fireball)
(same picture slightly scorched)

Page Eight
Padric: Someone’s out to get you! / They really want you dead, / And so they called me up today / So I could scorch your head! (as an aside) We sing; we dance: we kill heros! It’s all part of the service here at Good Riddance Inc.
(D y D in stunned silence, then collapse in giggles to outright hysterics)
Padric: Why doesn’t anyone take my message seriously? (grumbles) Stupid song. Mortimer shall die! Mercy stroke blah blah rant rant.

Yay for NaNoMangO!
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